"I could fail in chasing my dreams. But at least I have tried "
The fear of failing basically means having a lack of Self-Belief that one will not succeed. Failure could mean to not reach one’s goals, one’s expectations, to underperform, to embarrass oneself and so forth.
This article looks into the Cause of this fear and explore the ways to address this suffering state of mind.
Failing In Depth
The fear of failing can create a great deal of suffering. It can makes us afraid of making "mistakes." And when we make a mistake we can fear being punished for it / punish ourselves for it.
Not everyone will have this fear of failing in the same degrees. There will be people out there who don’t have much of this fear. There will be people who will be able to come into acceptance easier with the belief that it is ok to make a mistake in life. After all, it is impossible to live throughout life without making a single mistake
But why do some people have this fear more than others?
Importance Of Addressing Failing
It is important to address the fear of failing. But to address it one has to first develop the intention to address it so let us look at the negative impacts of the fear to develop the intention naturally.
When we carry a great fear of failing, the fear can inhibit us from chasing our dreams.
The Fear of failing can also create blockages to the Knowing of The Self especially in the areas of our desires. The fear can make one believe that one does not have a particular desire because of the fear, negative feelings it can bring out if one were to pursue the desire, for instance chasing one's dreams. Thus the fear can create great blockages in the energetic areas of the body (i.e. cakras) in particular in the areas of the heart, mind and throat – the areas concerning the expressions of The Self. Thus when we fear of failing we will be afraid to "voice" out our true opinions or fight for what we believe in. And within time this can manifest onto the surface as a physical disease.
The fear of failing also has a close relationship with the fear of heights and the fear of the unknown.
Path Of Creator
Failing In Relation To The Path Of Creator
As we journey into knowing what the Fear of Failing is really about, we will perhaps first discover that it has to do with the fear of making the wrong decisions i.e. making the right or wrong choices. But as we journey even deeper what we will discover that it is also about how other people will perceive us and how we will perceive ourselves when we fail.
Thus the main spiritual lessons that one will have to go through to transform and release the negativity will revolve around the theme of Self-Judgement.
The Fear At The Idea Level
As the Seed Cause of all forms of Sufferings recede to Negative Ideas, the fear of failing can be paraphrased as the following declaration –
“It is not ok to Fail”
The way the Negative Idea is sustained
There are many ways in which the Negative Idea is sustained. But the biggest action which sustains the fear is Self-Judgement – this includes judging oneself and judging other selves. That is because when we judge people when they fail we will fear being judged similarly when we fail.
Thus Self-Forgiveness and Self-Compassion is a great Catalyst to use one wishes to make great progress on the Path. Sometimes we can believe that Self-Condemnation is a necessary drive for the Self to grow and this negative belief can actually make us stagnate and pull us back from transforming and releasing our fears.
The three biggest things one can do for oneself on the journey is the following
1. Develop a more positive Self-Perception
2. Develop more Self-Compassion
3. Develop more Support For The Self
There are actually many catalysts one can use to accelerate one’s journey towards transformation.
One is to have the understanding that a lot of the fear of failing comes from our fears of not meeting other people’s definition of success. So by simply realizing this, one can begin to not let others define one’s own success by simply revisiting one’s own definition of success.
The other piece of wisdom one can use is to realize that the fear is exacerbated when one is in the constant strive for "perfection" and thinking of what is "right" and what is "wrong." The more one can be more flexible and accepting with oneself the easier the journey will be as all fears will always recede back to one root cause which is the lack of Self-Acceptance.
A piece of wisdom that one will accumulate throughout the journey is the wisdom that there is no need to fear about failing. Because after we fail, we can always just make it work again. I.e. there are always second chances – that is if we give ourselves one.
Seeing Failures As Opportunities To Succeed
The journey of transforming and releasing the fear of Failing will be a journey where we will not only transform our perception of ourselves when we fail, but also it will transform our perception of failure itself.
Often it takes one to experience many failures until one can let go of the attachment to the idea that failure is bad. It is through the accumulation of various experiences in life that one will gradually able to see failures as opportunities because it is through making mistakes that we can learn how not to make one.
Thus instead of seeing failure as failing to succeed, it is much better to see failure as failing in order to succeed.
When we try to overcome the fear of failing by making decisions we are also developing trust towards ourselves and also others. Because often we fear doing something because we cannot trust that we or others will see it as the right thing to do.
The destination is to reach a state where one can be in a state of acceptance towards oneself and others when it fails. This is achieved through Two-Way Acceptance, as when one begins to accept others for failing, one will begin to accept oneself for failing and vice versa.
Develop Experienced Knowledge
You can develop experienced Knowledge of how much fear you have in failing by observing the Negativities that brims out from within each time you have perceived someone as failing or each time you perceive yourself as failing.
The Creator's MeditationLink here
In your meditation journey when you begin to wander off in the mind in the imagination of being angry/sad at yourself or others when you or others fail simply observe it as it is and simply focus on your body journey with a Still Mind. This is how we indirectly develop Self-Compassion and Forgiveness - by allowing ourselves to spend more time in peace and happiness rather than dwelling in the negativities of Self-Judgement.
Courses On Failing
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