"The States Of Jealousy is breed from an Insecure Mind"
Jealousy here is defined as a suffering state of mind experienced – often involving anger and a sense of betrayal – when one’s friend/partner/relative is having interactions with another Self.
For instance, jealousy can be experienced when we see our partner interacting with another preson.
For instance, jealousy can be experienced when we see our mum giving more attention to our brothers or sisters more than us.
The Self includes everything that exists. So it can be a person, an object, an animal and so forth.
See Catalyst – Envy for the difference in meaning between Jealousy and Envy.
Jealousy In Depth
Jealousy is a Negative mental state.
Within the Negativity are issues to do with insecurity – i.e. a fear of being replaced, a fear of someone leaving us, a fear of someone betraying us, a fear of someone not being loyal to us.
I.e. it is the fear that our partners will leave us for someone else that can arouse Jealousy within us.
I.e. it is the fear that our friends will replace us with someone more “deserving of attention” than us that can arouse jealousy within when we see them ignoring us and paying more attention to others.
Thus to truly release The Self from issues of Jealousy requires one to take the journey deep into The Self to discover the cause for the Insecurity Within.
Importance Of Addressing Jealousy
Jealousy is a state that must be addressed if one wishes to create healthier relationships with other Selves. This is because when we experience Jealousy, it is a sign that there is a lack of Security Within. As a result, this can drive one to become over-clingy, over-possessive and over suspicious of Other Self.
In relationships driven by jealousy, it can lead to a lot of arguments and a lot of questioning and doubts. Such relationships are unhealthy because it can be one filled with frustration. And often when one is overly-jealous of the Other Self, the Other Self will experience pressure from constantly being questioned by the Other Self and having to explain and make up for one’s supposedly “wrong-doings.”
Jealousy thus often can drive a relationship to collapse and end, ironically making one’s fears of the other person leaving them into reality. Thus it is only when a relationship is not driven by the states of Jealousy that it can be stable. When one sees everything with the eyes of jealousy, their relationships can seem dark and unstable.
And it is only when one looks within for the Cause of Jealousy rather than Outwards that one can realize that the cause for one's insecurity comes from one's lack of Self-Confidence and Self-Acceptance. It is then from this state of mind that one can see things in a clearer light.
Thus the work on transforming one’s state of Jealousy will not only benefit one’s relationships with Other Selves but it also will allow one to develop Inner Strength within – by filling that hole with emotional and mental security.
Path Of Creator
Jealousy In Relation To The Path Of Creator
The Path Of Creator is about transforming and releasing oneself completely from one’s Sufferings.
Jealousy is one of the Suffering States that can cause great pains especially in the context of relationships.
Often one does not realize that one has issues with jealousy that needs to be addressed. It is only when one begins to desire / goes into a close relationship with another person that the issues can usually surface and be brought out into light.
Often in the scenario when one experiences jealousy, the solution that most people would try will often involve accusations or negotiations with one’s loved ones to not interact with other people. Although this is a good way to express one’s “insecurity” to the Other Self, but without truly addressing the Cause of such Insecurities, it will become overbearing and put the pressure on the other person leading to the breakup of the relationship.
What one wishes to do at the action level when one experienecs jealousy is one's own free will. However to develop greater happiness in life one has to learn to address Jealousy at the state of the mind.
And the journey will take one into discovering the deeper cause of experiencing this state i.e. to discover one's insecurities, to discover one's lack of self-confidence. The journey of transforming the negative state of Jealousy will be one of developing Self-Acceptance beacause when one is unable to be happy alone by themselves, one can end up relying on others for happiness. When one is self-content with themselves, then what things Other Selves do will not affect one's state of happiness
The destination is towards developing Self-Acceptance in the forms of Self-Confidence and Self-Contentment. From this state of mind, one will able to accept whatever Other Selves do at the level of mind. And from this state of mind, one will be able to see things with clarity and make better assessments of the situation i.e. to make better judgements on whether or not one wishes to continue the relationship with the Other Self.
At The Idea Level
One of the ways Jealousy can be paraphrased into a Negative Idea is with the following Negative Declaration
“It is not ok for him/her to interact closely with Other Selves”
And within this Negative Ideas we will often discover Ideas such as,
“It is not ok to be replaced”
“It is not ok to be ignored”
“It is not ok for her/him to share the love with someone else”
And so forth
Once one discovers the Negative Ideas and their deeper causes within then one can begin to Transform and Release these Negative Ideas. And the journey will often involve one to discover that the attachment to these Negative Ideas come from a lack of Inner-Security.
The Spiritual Lessons that one will go through thus will involve the development of Self-Confidence, Self-Trust, Self-Approval and so forth.
For instance, it can be a lack of Self-Confidence that one has in oneself that can drive one to fear being “replaced.” If one finds this to be the lesson, the solution is to develop Self-Confidence. See Catalyst – Self Confidence.
For instance, it can be a lack of Self-Trust in the other Self that he/she won’t replace us or cheat on us or won’t be disloyal to us that can drive one to experience Jealousy. If one finds this to be the lesson, the solution is to develop Self-Trust. See Catalyst – Self Trust. And there are many ways to develop Self-Trust.
Thus it will be a spiritual journey of developing Self-Acceptance/Love.
Once the “Hole” within is addressed and filled then the illusion of the Other-Self “betraying” us will be dispelled.
In saying this, Self-Transformation is not about becoming blind to the fact that the Other-Self may be cheating on us. But it's about transforming the state of mind within whether or not this may be true so that one can be happy no matter what the truth of the reality is. It is from this state of happiness and stillness that one can then see the Truth for what it is and make better judgements on how to maintain or whether to end the relationship they have with their other half.
Develop Experienced Knowledge
Whenever you experience Jealousy, you can always ask yourself the following question,
“What is it that I am fearing?”
The Creator's Meditation / VipassanaLink here
Whenever you experience the imagination of the other person cheating on you, or if you experience the fear of being replaced, you can simply Meditate.
And as you meditate no doubt images of the other person doing what you fear will begin to surface. In such a scenario simply do the body journey throughout the body trying your best not to “wander off.” This will allow the “dark thoughts” to slowly dissipate.
And as Stillness comes back within the mind, this is when you will be able to see all with clarity, to know clearly whether you are being “overly-suspicious” or whether you are simply insecure about yourself.
Know and Transform The Self!
Try the 10 Day One-Self Catalyst to realize that you have all that you need in life - Yourself. In realizing this you will experience great happiness and will no longer need to rely on reaching for things outwards for happiness.